results! I stuck to my new years revolutions... so far!

1 : I'm going to stop eating bread
2 : I will post a blog at least once a month
3 : I'm going to know which Uni I want to go to 
4 : I'm going to take care of my appearance
5 : Audition for the National Youth Theatre

I am amazed at myself. Truly blog readers I. Am. Amazed. So far (nearly two months into the new year) and I've already stuck to... wait for it 

FOUR OF MY RESOLUTIONS

This is undoubtedly a great achievement for me, as before I've never kept a resolution more than a few weeks, but here we are  on the brink of March (a time of exams) and I've already completed two of my resolutions and am currently working on the others. So I thought you may like an update (after the depressingness of the last post I also felt I needed something more light hearted)

1: I will stop eating bread - ever since New Years Day I have stopped eating bread, well until last week where all I could eat for breakfast and lunch was bread, but until Poland I had not had a single piece of bread. Brown healthy pitta breads = yes. But no white bread what so ever and I am so incredibly pleased with myself, because before all I thought about was how soft on the inside and crunchy on the outside the French Bread was going to be! 

2: I will post a blog at least once a month - As you can see I've stuck with that one so far, and I probably will carry on with it as best I can because I'm enjoying getting home and logging onto my blog because, well, I'm an addict. There I said it. I, Harriet Corey, am addicted to blogging. Most of it nonsense! Tehe. 

3: I will know which Uni I want to go to  - After a successful ACT Day (Alternative Curriculum Time) researching Universities and other options I have decided my aim is The University of Surrey where I will study Drama and Theatre Studies. I need ABB or AAB to get in (I know, that's allot of hard work but I'll try my best) and it seems like my ideal. I've visited Guildford, the nearest town, and I love it. No not just because I found Lilo and Stitch in a charity shop for £2.50 (Although that had something to do with it) 

4: This one isn't working... yet. Check back with me in a few months and I may be looking as amazing as Cheryl Cole. (not)

5: Audition for NYT : Yes good blog readers, I did it. I auditioned on the 20th of February at London's Bubble Theatre and you know what? I loved it. I managed to get up to London on my own (first time ever) and catch a tube then walk the twenty minutes to the theatre! HOW AMAZING! 

I honestly don't think I have got in, this time around, but they did say that I was very good and I just need more confidence! How great is that? Although I think I needed to be a little more active in the group workshop! But some of those people were scary! 

So there you have it blog readers! I am one happy bunny thanks to keeping up with some of my resolutions this late into the year, I know I make it sound like October but never before have I done so well when it comes to keeping these silly things! 

Anyways I had better go and do some work otherwise that ABB will not be, and then I'll have to rethink Uni's and it's taken me far too long to decide all ready! 

Love to you all 

xox

HarrietCorey 

PS. SO close to 2,000 blog views... *mini party*

See! Even Terrence is happy for me!

   

"each rock represents one person that died"

Only when we remember
Do we learn something new

Afternoon blog readers! I'm sorry I couldn't finish the earlier post with as much gusto and enthusiasm as it needs, but I was in desperate need of a dog walk and an awful lot of tea and reflection before coming back to the computer and trying to find words. 

After visiting Auschwitz we sat in a cafe outside of the camp and drank hot chocolate (as we did every other time we came in from the cold) However our break wasn't a long one as once we had finished our lunches in a box (this consisted of a cheese and lettuce sandwich, a bar of chocolate and two very hard oranges) we got back in our coach and traveled the short distance to Birkenau (otherwise known as Auschwitz 2) the second camp which was built entirely by prisoners of the camp. Why did they build a new camp? Because Auschwitz wasn't big enough for them. It took 45 hours to burn all the bodies of just one group sent to the gas chambers in Auschwitz and so the Nazi's decided they needed somewhere bigger and "better". 

And so Birkenau was created. 30 times bigger. hundreds more killed. ten times worse to visit. 

When I thought of the camps before I signed on for the trip all I knew was about Auschwitz, I hadn't heard of Birkenau, which scares me slightly because it was so much worse to think about. We thought that Auschwitz was big but it was nothing compared to Birkenau. For a start there was nothing left. 

A handful of building and miles of fencing was all you could see. Actually that isn't right, what was the scariest thing was the "forest of chimneys" all of which were once attached to a wooden bunker which housed Jewish people in tight, filthy conditions. 

Many of you will have seen the iconic image of the railway tracks running through the stone entrance and some of you may have thought how pretty something so horrible could be. I did at one point. I'm an A-Level art student and I have moments where I forget about what something is and just look at the artistic value of it. I am ashamed to admit I did this in Birkenau. However this showed me that we can go on these trips to such places, we can walk along the same path hundreds walked to their death and still we can think of trivial and human things like "I'm hungry" and "how that would make a good photo or final piece for my art" it's a shocking realization that no-matter what we do we cannot change who we are, and although I've learnt a lot from the trip and although I have a better understanding of what happened in the camps I will still always be Harriet Corey, the school girl who loves Disney and who can go home and live her life how she wants it to be. 

You may have noticed that through all of this I have not mentioned crying at any point, that is simply because I didn't cry, not until the end. 

Right at the back of Birkenau is a stone monument made up of little stones "why?" because it is Jewish tradition that when someone dies a rock is placed on their graves to show that someone has remembered and that the deceased will never be forgotten, each indervidual stone represents one of the million who died in the death camp. However on this monument are plaques in every language you could think of which translate to: 

"Forever let this place be a cry of despair and a warning to humanity, 

where the Nazi's murdered about one and a half million

men, women, and children, mainly Jews from various countries of Europe.

Auschwitz-Birkenau 

1940 - 1945"

Our guide around the camps told us before taking us down the row of plagues all in different languages that the English translation was only put there so that we could remember and understand and that all of the other languages were spoken by people who died in the camps at the hands of the Nazi's and how English speaking people were not subjected to the gassing or hard labor in the camps. 

It was only when I stood before the plague that I felt something inside of me break and my eyes started to water. The whole time i'd spent in the camps I had started to understand, just a little, about how the millions must have felt and suddenly I realised I still had no idea, I'm English and I've always been proud of my heritage and it was only then that I realized we hadn't any idea what was happening and for a moment I felt like I shouldn't be there, stood on a stone monument dedicated to all the men, women and children. 

So I looked around at my friends, my teachers and my tour guide and I saw that I had as much right as anyone else, I don't want the holocaust to happen again, I cannot imagine anyone being bullied to the extreme like that. I cannot let it happen again and even if England wasn't subjected to the heartless cruelty we still have the right to be allowed to stand in the camps and feel sorrow for all the lives lost, related or not we are all connected and we are all part of this world and no man, woman or child should be victimized in that way. 

So readers you may ask, "what did you learn from the trip?"

My honest answer? more than I can possibly fit into words, I learnt about a time of suffering, I learnt the stories of people who lived and loved not long ago and who died because they weren't seen as "normal" by one person. More than anything I've been given a renewed sense of the value of life and I swear that I will live each of my days here on earth to the best I can and never let an opportunity pass me by, because you never know what will happen next.

Well readers there is so so much more that I could say, but for now I will leave you in peace for I have said all I can say for today but I learnt so many other things on my trip which I will surely share with you at one point or another!

Only one last thing remains for tonight and that is to say :

Thank you to everyone who went on the trip and both wonderful teachers who organised the trip. I have learnt so much and it wouldn't have been the same without any of you. 

Also blog readers a final little note, our tour guide said something which I feel I have to repeat:

"If we forget what happened to these people then each one of their spirits dies all over again" 

xox

HarrietCorey

p.s I'm copying both posts about the trip into a "page" as well as leaving them on the main blog, so that they will always be easily accessed because I really think it's important to remember. 

"If you forget, then the spirits of these people die again"

It was a hard trip to go on

but one I'll never forget

At the end of the last school year I was given a letter which in retrospect changed my life. It was titled 

"2011 Trip to Krakow" For those of you who don't know Krakow is the former capital of Poland and one of the closest towns to Auschwitz : The Nazi concentration and death camps. 

I left on Monday at 1:30 in the morning with a group of year 13 and 12 from my school. None of us really knew what to expect. Personally I expected tears, sorrow and most of all a very sad trip but the trip as a whole was the opposite of that, I know it may be hard to believe but visiting Krakow was great fun and full of laughter more than anything else. I should probably point out that Krakow as a town is barely associated with the camps. Yes it's the nearest place to stay but it has a history of it's own and we spent a lot of time getting to know the market square, the freezing cold and the history behind the town (along with our tour guide's nasal hair and boogers) 

The Church In Market Square

 Krakow as a town is stunning, we visited when everything was sprinkled in snow and despite the -15 temperatures snow constantly fell from the sky. Although it looked more like glitter than snow! 

On our first day our guide took us on a tour of the city, which was supposed to be a 4 hour walking tour, she told us marvelous fairytale stories of an Italian Princess who married the Prince/King in Krakow and brought with her exotic veggie-tables (that's how it was said much to our amusement) and a tale of a Dragon which was to be killed and now to remember this tale stands a proud fire breathing statue. We also encountered the very alien concept of having to pay to take photos... and the idea that 35 zloties was only about £7!!!! Bargains all around! 

That evening we stepped out of the cold and into a traditional restaurant, complete with a log fire and fur benches which advertised "Goulash" a very interesting dish made of soup, not in a bowl but in a pot made from bread!!!

Goulash!

The evening then consisted of us all getting into our "onesies" a great thing I fear I will never regret buying. Warm, comfy, made me feel like a baby again. Heaven in a sack basically! 

We gathered on the landing outside everyone's rooms where we chatted for a little while before deciding a group game was in order. Little did us unsuspecting year 12's know we would be subjected to a violent and compromising game which left us addicted. Yes for those of you who are reading this and know what i'm talking about I mean Ninja Slap. 

Ninja Slap is a great game where you stand in a tight circle placing your hands in the middle before jumping back shouting 

"OHHHHH NINJA"

Then you go around the circle making one move in which you have to slap someone's hand, if both your hands get slapped, you're out. Simple as that. Only the positions we found ourselves in weren't so simple... We had people on one leg, rolling on the floor, looking like they were about to propose and just standing casually around looking completely lost (I was probably the last one!) 

However that night wasn't all fun and games considering in a matter of hours we would be visiting Auschwitz and  Birkenau. 

That evening passed quickly and before we knew what was happening we were on the coach watching, or in some cases sleeping though, a video on what we were about to see. 

No words can describe the camps. During those few hours spent there I felt such raw and intense emotions nothing can compare, we were told taking photo's was aloud and that evening we discussed how it felt to take photos in a place where so many people had died. 

Personally I felt horrible, I had to force myself into taking the photos as I knew deep down that I would want evidence to come home and show people just how horrible it was, I knew that I wouldn't be able to find the right words as I so often can in other situations. 

We first went to Auschwitz, walking through the in-famous arch with the words "Arbeit macht Frei"

translating to "Work makes free" we all knew that hundreds had passed though these gates never to walk out of the other side. Where as we, a group of 16 - 18 year olds would be able to walk away back to our lives, back to our families and friends and if we chose we would never have to think about the camp again, none of us would choose that. 

No-one can really explain the size of the camp other than to say the large brick buildings towered above us as we walked through the cold and into the exhibitions showing us hair, shoes, glasses, things that we all know. Common objects which we all had or had seen within the last few moments before entering, only these objects weren't common. These were the items taken by the Nazi's after gassing the Jews. 

One of the girls on the trip, Georgia, later told me that the worst bit about the room filled with hair was it all looked the same except one bright blonde piece, this is an image she will never forget. 

Even on the last day of our trip people were still saying: 

"how much hair was there?" 

"Two tones" 

"how much did they say there was before?"

"seven tones" 

"how much was burnt or sold?"

"we don't know"

I heard this conversation at least five time son the trip and it goes to show that the numbers and the figures were so hard to comprihend, that we could never imagine just how many people were there. However where as we would not understand the numbers the Nazi's saw only numbers. Not humans, not people with blood and a family and a life, they saw them as either "useful "or "useless" one simple gesture send hundreds to either a quick death straight away or the long agonizing struggle in the camp. 

I guess you will have noticed I haven't put any picture's on here yet and that's because I don't know how. I don't know as of yet which of my photo's show best the horror or show you how hard it was walking through the camp. However I can tell you one thing, writing this blog is the hardest thing I've had to do, I want to tell you about it. I want to stop it happening again, to encourage you to go to the camps and see the site for yourself. To go and walk through the gate of Birkenaeu and feel the temperature drop even though you know it's impossible. To walk into the gas chamber and see the scratch marks from the nails of suffocating people.

But I can't type the words which would tell you all of this in a way you could understand. Maybe from what I've already said you'll understand. Maybe not. If you ever get the opportunity to go to Poland and visit the camps then please do, but don't go lightheartedly. Think about what you're going to see and genuinely want to see it, no not to see it, to experience it. Because the concentration and death camps are not  just a matter of seeing it's a matter of feeling and experiencing everything a little bit of what happened. 

So blog readers for now I need to leave you with what I've already said, because I don't think I can say anything more about the second camp: Birkenau, at least not yet. 

So keep safe my readers and remember that we went there out of choice, others weren't so lucky. 

xox

HarrietCorey. 

Ps. I will make another post about the rest of the trip but not yet :)

Valentines *nawh*

Valentines Day:

"An annual commemoration held on February 14 celebrating love and affection between intimate companions"

I'm a self glorified romantic, I love valentines and anything soppy like that. Well I do in the movies in real life I get really embarrassed if a guy does something sweet for me, but really annoyed if he doesn't! (I know I'm weird)

However yesterday, it being valentines, I went into school all happy and looking forward to spending a day with my friends celebrating love. (I'd already had a valentines day on Sunday with the boyfriend so that wasn't in my mind at all) Anyways I went into my common room and all everyone was talking about was "Single Awareness Day"

I love Single Awareness Day, I think it's a great day but when you feel victimised for being in a relationship especially on valentines it gets a little annoying. I doubt any of you readers will agree with me, maybe you will but I think I could be alone in this thought. Wikipedia told me:

"It serves as an alternative to Valentine's Day for people who are single, that is, not involved in a romantic relationship. Some people who observe S.A.D. do so out of spite for Valentine's Day, as a Hallmark holiday, or for other reasons."

So do any of us really have a right to say "I hate valentines" when in a few years when you are married or in a relationship you'll suddenly change your mind? Should we complain so much that other single people and people in relationships (who are happy being so) feel bad and avoid you because of the complaining? But most of all do I have a right to feel upset and a little annoyed at all the people who spitefully change valentines into S.A.D? I guess not.

I hope everyone had a wonderful valentines, because even if you aren't in a relationship you are loved and the whole point is celebrating LOVE not RELATIONSHIPS!

LOVE YOU BLOG READERS

Sorry If that made no sense!

xox

HarrietCorey

RUMOUR ALERT!

TENNANT TO BE BLOOM'S DAD

The Hobbit is coming to cinemas near you!

News just found (yes, English lessons are productive) The rumours of a two part film of J.K.Tolkin's "The Hobbit" are now officially true but that's not the best part, the cast list features some of today's biggest stars. Martin Freeman (Hitchhikers Guide To The Galaxy) is to star Bilbo, Ian McKellen is to return as Gandalf and Orlando Bloom is back as Legolas...

BUT THAT'S NOT ALL...

Rumour has it that David Tennant (yes, THE Doctor) is to play Bloom's father Thranduil!!

David Tennant was first rumoured to be playing Bilbo Baggins but has now shot down those rumours and revealed his "true role" supposedly!

So blog readers keep your eyes on the look-out, because I don't know about you but I'm wishing away 2011 and hoping 2012 brings lots of Hairy-Footed madness (Finally I will belong in society with my hairy feet and shortness!)  - I kid.

Well I have to go to drama lessons now but I love you all :D

Ps. don't forget to link to your friends (because you love me)

xox

HarrietCorey

Death.

Death is a funny thing

We never expect it until it's too late

My next door neighbor died this week, I won't say how but he was too young to die and his life was still good, he was only in his early 40's.

I've only experienced Death twice before, one was of an english teacher in year 8 and one was my Gramndma when I was in primary school. When you're young you don't understand Death, you don't realise how it effects people. I've never been very good when it comes to my emotions, sometimes i'm happy and sometimes I'm sad but when hearing my neighbor had passed away was something different, it made me think... I think alot about life any way but this was a different kind of thought, this was the idea that we spend our lives building our career, our family and then one day it ends. Some times suddenly without reason and sometimes slowly.

My neighbor's death was slow compared to someone being hit by a train and quick compared to people who wait their whole lives just to die. Every day we watch films like P.S I love you and we think "how sweet, I want to leave notes for all my family before I die" but what happens when you don't get this choice, what happens when you have an argument you need to resolve? It's hard to know what to do in the face of death, it's hard to know what to say or what to think. A very wise woman told me that the hardest thing to do when a family member has died is to know when to laugh or smile again, the questions fly around your head "When can I sit and watch tv?" "When is it ok not to cry anymore?" Honestly, I don't know. I've never lost a close family member or friend, i've lost people around me but never anyone i'm so close to that I have such greif.

-Carrying on a few days later-

I had to stop writing this post the other day, not because I was consumed by greif but simply because I didn't have the words to say how I feel about death. I'm going to visit the consentration camps in two weeks time so i'm going to have to find a way to show how I feel about this kind of thing.

 I guess readers, what I'm trying to say is that death is everywhere, it's all around and there is very little we can do to stop it (Unless you're Dr Who, but even he will die at somepoint) However when someone dies we are left with something precious. Something we should hold onto.. their memory. I've never forgotten my Grandma or my English teacher and I will never forget my next door neighbor. They may not be a part of my life anymore but they are a part of my past and no-matter how hard we try we cannot forget our past, I still listen to a song and it brings back memories of my Grandma or read a passage of Noughts and Crosses and think of Mrs. G and I doubt I will ever be able to hear a lawn mower without thinking of James out in his garden early in the morning, I hated all these things at the time but now i've come to love them because it reminds me of people who've be taken away.

So all I can really leave you with readers is a simple quote I found randomly on the internet:

"Memory is a way of holding on to the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to loose"

xox
HarrietCorey